My Epilepsy and Friends (Part 1)

Having Epilepsy is a huge trial. That's no secret.

(I have changed the names in this post for privacy reasons)

Ever since all of us were kids, we have had friends at some point or another. Some of our friendships have lasted for years and some have lasted for as little as a day. Friends are great to have no matter how long it lasts.

When I was in preschool I had a best friend; JoJo. She moved away in Kindergarten without telling me. I found out she moved when I was riding my bike around my neighborhood with my cousin and we saw a "Sold" sign in my best friend's yard. I had no idea where she moved to. The next time I talked to her was when I saw her on Facebook when I was 17. So, that was sad for me.

The next friend I had was a girl who lived across the street from me; Kirstin. We were more of close friends than best friends and we had been since she moved in when I was five years old. That friendship lasted for ten years, simply because we lived across the street from each other. I loved playing with her and we had great imaginations. We would play for hours on end everyday.

When I turned eight, I made a new friend at a neighborhood party; Jennifer. We became instant friends and were best friends for nine years. We went everywhere together and though we got in fights a lot, we had great times.

In high school I made more friends, but they were just people I hung out with mostly at school.

When someone thinks of the word "friend", they think of someone who cares. Someone who is always there for you. Someone who won't judge you. Growing up, that is something I had always wanted. When you are a kid, friends come and go, so I didn't think about finding an amazing friend for life until I got older. But when I turned eight, I thought my then best friend (Jennifer) would be my best friend for life. I never would have guessed we would drift apart.

When I first started having seizures at the age of 13, I thought my friends would always be there for me and not judge me for having seizures. I knew they might feel nervous when they would see me have one, but I didn't think they would ever be scared of me. Boy, was I wrong.

When my friends found out I had seizures, they wouldn't hang out with me as much. When I would want to hang out, they would say they couldn't and when I would see them later that day, they would be hanging out with someone else. One time I remember well was when my best friend Jennifer and I were in my room and I had a Simple-Partial Seizure. I froze for about 15 seconds and when I came out of it, she looked absolutely horrified of me. Another time I remember specifically is when I was at school and one of my friends, Adrian, was standing next to me. Even though she knew I had seizures, she watched me like I was an alien.

Epilepsy has definitely made me figure out who my real friends are. I am no longer friends with those people. It hurts to know that we used to be best friends and now we don't talk anymore.

One good thing that came out of my last best friend leaving, is finding my best friend, Aubrey. I cannot ask for a better one. She is a very quiet person, but one day at school she came over to eat with me and my former best friend, Jennifer. As she continued to eat with us everyday, Jennifer decided to stop. From then on, it was just me and the quiet girl, Aubrey. Gradually, we started to talk more and hang out and we became best friends. The day she found out I had seizures was when we were with a group of people walking home from an activity. I stopped in my tracks and looked up at the stars. Jennifer tried to cover for me and told Aubrey what was happening. The other people were rude and commented that I was just doing it for attention. I walked home alone, crying, but that's besides the point. Later on, when we had hung out a couple of times, she asked me what I would want her to do when I was having seizures and how I wanted her to react. I told her to just pretend nothing is happening. Ever since then, she stays quiet when I have them and doesn't get uncomfortable or scared.

So, having Epilepsy has helped me realize who my real friends are.

Lately, I have been feeling better about my Epilepsy. I have some amazing people that I email who are in similar situations. It's so nice that though they aren't in the exact same situation as me, we still feel better knowing we are going through similar things.

I mentioned one of them in my previous post. She has a blog that you should all check out!

https://free22545.wordpress.com/

Stay tuned for Part 2: How To Properly React To Someone Who Has Seizures: Sara's Experience