Monday, February 19, 2018

Plan B














    Written: February 6th

Hello again! How is life? Mine is okay. I have a lot to talk about. The first being, what 
happened after starting birth control.

Everything started out okay. However, after about a week into taking the pill, I had seizures. It's something I am used to, obviously, but they were frequent and more extreme. I decided to give it a while, and see if things would improve. After three weeks, nothing got better. The seizures stayed the same. That was the end of that.

Plan B was Progesterone. A natural hormone in a woman that helps prepare them for pregnancy. Progesterone can be made into a pill that many people take to regulate their hormones. A lot of people with epilepsy have tried it as well, and the Progesterone has often reduced their seizures. Even before my doctors appointment, my mom thought it was a better idea to try the Progesterone instead of birth control. See, Estrogen is another hormone in a woman's body that contributes to the development of her body. Anyway, I am glad that I tried the birth control so I could check that one off the list. Soon after I got off the pill, I started Progesterone. Now, I was hopeful that it would help control my seizures and possibly reduce them. Soon after starting it, I noticed a different in the severity of the seizures. Instead of the norm, where I freeze and clench my fist, talking in monotone, I would sometimes just stare. I still had the others, but it was nice that I noticed an improvement.

Any type of hormone you take will take up to six months to start effecting the body. At first I was discouraged. I was still having seizures, but my sister told me that I shouldn't worry because hormones take a while to start the effect. I know I will always have epilepsy. That is something that is a part of me. I don't know if the seizures will ever go away, but I have hope.

At the age of 13 when I was diagnosed with epilepsy, my world came crashing down, along with my self-esteem. I used to be energetic and happy when I was younger, expecting to drive at 16 with my friends, but that changed. No driving for me. However, I have grown so much both physically and mentally. I am stronger than I ever was. I am proud of myself and who I have become.

Yesterday at work, I was having some simple-partial seizures. Someone asked me to go get some ice and I said okay in my monotone voice. I always keep my drink on top of the ice machine, and I picked it up. I noticed my old drink from Saturday was up there, and I picked that up. Next thing I know, I dropped one of the drinks, and my Powerade spilled everywhere. Luckily, it spilled on top of the grate where the melted ice goes. My manager asked me a couple minutes later if I was okay, and I said yes. He hadn't seen the spilled drink. A couple seconds later, my other manager came out, and watched me, concerned. They took me to the back and I sat down. Something that bothered me was when I was standing by the ice machine, and my co-worker was staring at me. When I was sitting in the back, I heard both the managers and my co-worker talking like I was a child. They were saying how my eyes were super dilated and how I said I had dropped my drink. I felt incredibly embarrassed. Now, don't get me wrong, they are very nice and have talked to me about my epilepsy before. They know all about it. A few days ago, I was called into the back, and one of the owners talked to me about my seizures. He was quite nice about it, and genuinely cared about my well-being. He talked to me when he saw me sitting on a stool, and he had me go in the office, and I sat in the big comfy chair. I sat in there until I felt well again. I had no more seizures that day.

I am at the airport right now, headed to Ohio to see my sister, brother-in-law, as well as my niece and nephew. It's weird to me, taking a break. All I've done since July is work. Non-stop. I definitely need this. This is one of the sisters who I lived with. So much has changed since then.

I am so grateful for all of the support I have in my life. My family has done nothing but help me, supporting me, making sure I am okay. Though they do not have epilepsy, they do all they can to make sure I am okay. I'm grateful for my best friend, who has always been there for me, and treats me like I am normal. When I have seizures in front of her, she acts like nothing is happening, and waits for me to come out of it. I can't thank her enough.

I want to say something to all of you. No matter what you have going on in your life, you can do it! It doesn't matter if you think you are weak. You aren't! You've accomplished so much, and if I can do it, so can you! Never compare yourself to others because you are you. If you don't believe me, that is okay. I believe in you!